Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Greetings via Skyler Hardman

Skyler has been a surprisingly huge supporter of this blog, & making it more common knowledge around Snow College campus, even though I don't want him to. Skyler seems to be quite a big man around this campus: from writing in the School newspaper, to being a leader on the Ambassador team, does his duties as the treasurer of the Business club, and even chatting it up on the radio station-- The Kage.
1. Me: color?
Skyler: white
2. Me: Favorite bedtime preparation activity?
Skyler: The evening chat with my roommates
(we are then interrupted by a startling package coming from his backpack. When the contents are exposed i am exceedingly anxious and very disturbed. He produces white bread, a brand new bottle of my least favorite thing Squeezable mayo & then 3 different types of my least favorite snack-- Slim Jims. Dry heaving errupts and shatters my whole body. We eventually move past the awful smelly snack & return to the scheduled interview...) Photos courtesy of Jacee Hardman
3. Me: Desired super power?
Skyler: Time travel
4. Me: Creepiest thing you have ever done?
Skyler: One time I was at Carl’s Jr, one of my best friends throughout my whole life Jesse Holman ordered a shake, without whipped cream. They ignored his request and gave him whipped cream which he shaved off and put on a napkin and then everyone I was with the window and then I was dared to throw the whipped cream on the window and my friends said they would pay me. So I did it. On the way out, I chucked it at the window whilst saying, “I said no whipped cream!” That ten bucks paid for my bowling at Jack & Jill's that night.
5. Me: favorite past time?
Skyler: Baseball. It’s America’s past time.
6. Me: sought after vocation?
Skyler: (said in an almost disturbing whisper) “Does that mean my job?” Well then, a sports news anchor.
7. Me: What percent of the population would you say can multi-task, & do you think you can?
Skyler: 48%. And they don’t do it well. And no.
8. Me: Best & worst memory?
Skyler: Best: Family trips. Worst: being struck in my crotchal region with a baseball while on the radio.
9. Me: Today is November 2nd, do you plan on casting a ballot?
Skyler: I tried, turns out you have to register first.
10. Me: Feelings on the Obama’s Health Care reform?
Skyler: I think it’s called socialism and I don’t like it. But, I haven’t researched it that much, and I may be brainwashed by Fox News.
11. Me: Favorite thing about Snow College?
Skyler: The girls. Not very original.
12. Me: How do you deal with conflict?
Skyler: I win.
13. Me: Favorite Nabisco product?
Skyler: Does that include the parent company Kraft? (Answer is No.) Well then, Oreos, not double stuffed.
14. Me: Would you rather have a cup & a half of sand in your underwear, or a cup & half of mayonnaise in your hair for a whole day?
Skyler: I would easily pick sand. The persistant vomitting by yourself and those around you would be unbearable if you had mayo.
15. Me: Biggest Accomplishment?
Skyler: Serving a two year mission... twice. (???)
16. Me: Favorite catch phrase?
Skyler: the game. Ok um, “Uhhh” (lower than his typical voice) followed with a nice fist pound. My second favorite is G’d up from the feet up. It means your gangster from your toes to your head.
17. Me: Biggest pet peeve?
Skyler: Something that I hear Ashley Palmer does. Setting your alarm an hour before you have to get up.
18. Me: What makes you laugh? What makes you cry? What makes you laugh while you cry?
Skyler: Humor. Sadness. Someone getting hit where it hurts. Because I laugh while I cry.
19. Me: You have just been granted 3 ultimate wishes. What do you wish for?
Skyler: (eyes closed in a sort of deep serene silence.) 1. I wish to always have a happy family. (Can my question mess with people’s free agency? Okay then, )2. I wish for my future kids one day to always desire to live the Gospel of Christ. 3. To have a lifetime supply of squeezable mayonnaise.
20. Me: What song describes your life?
Skyler: (reflective laughter) #1 by Nelly. I just have to stick with my theme. Cocky seems to be my theme today.
21. Me: Would you rather have one eyebrow shaved, or no eyelashes?
Skyler: One eyebrow. I mean do you understand how important your eyelashes are? Do you want sweat from your brow running into your eyes after you work out?!!

22. Me: Favorite scripture?
Skyler: Looking around franticallly, Oh I don’t have them. (Said with conviction) Mosiah 7:33, I think. (Nevermind the conviction)  I don’t know it’s on my plaque. I really like Ether though. I really like Matthew 7 I mean 11, the last three verses. I went to Catholic mass this week.... (bringing him back from memory lane to the interview...)
23. Me: What is your favorite childhood memory with Jacee?
Skyler: Free style rapping. We’re dope. We were good. (gaining momentum) Like we are straight out the hood. Frankly just exploring our musical talents together.
24. Me: Favorite workout?
Skyler: Who says that’s apart of my life? Sports. Basketball. Actually I like baseball more, but it’s hard to get together and play baseball.
25. Me: Biggest adventure?
Skyler: Roadtrip to LA (posed as almost a question, followed into a startling rampage.) Included WALL-E which sucked. Ten bucks each to see it. I don’t reccommend it.
26. Me: What is something that most people don’t know about you?
Skyler: (quizzical brow appears) I one day would like to be a Stand-up commedian. I just love making people laugh. You know what? I killed it at FHE today. I made like 4 people laugh. The hard ones are naturally funny. Especially Jacee and I.
Me: Final Words?
Skyler: I would like to give a shout out to any international readers on this blog. Hold on. I don’t want to blow this. Peace. Don’t say peace. (Laughing creepily to himself.) G’ed up from the feet up. Uhhh.

So as you can see, Skyler is quite the joy of a guy. He is a self proclaimed humble soul, & he keeps me laughing.

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